Messes

   Hi Friends! I was thinking today about messes and how aggravating they can be. Messes drain our energy and focus, and they make us feel stressed, disorganized and overwhelmed. Living in an environment that is cluttered and messy can take a toll on us mentally and emotionally, and may even harm us physically if things get too messy. Additionally, have you heard that your outward environment is a reflection of your inward environment? Maybe you are surrounded by chaos because your thoughts are chaotic. 

  If you want to see improvements in your life this year, I encourage you to start by getting your environment cleaned up. This is one of the most fundamental steps you can take to get your life moving in the direction of your dreams and goals, and here are three ways you can start. 

1. Make it a Routine

  It has been said, “The secret of your success is found in your daily routine.” And this is true when it comes to your environment too. Do you have a daily habit of cleaning and straightening up? Or do you spend all week throwing the mail, your work clothes, and the dirty dishes into piles until the weekend when you frantically try to gain control? A small shift in habits can make a big difference in your environment. A few changes that have helped me are: putting things away as soon as I am finished with them, doing a load of laundry and a sink of dishes every day, and not procrastinating; if there is mail I take care of it right away; if there is a mess I clean it up. These small shifts in habit make a big difference. 

2. Don’t Let Things Pile Up

  I don’t know about you, but I hate extra junk lying around. If I’m not using it, I’m not keeping it. The less things there are the less to clean, organize, pick up, etc. The strategy I use for keeping useless or unwanted items from piling up is this: First, if it’s broken, worn, or otherwise not worth giving away, I throw it out immediately. Secondly, I have a designated spot (the Livingroom closet) where I keep a bag. Anytime I come across something we aren’t using or don’t need, I put it in the bag. When the bag is full, I take it to donate. This prevents broken or unwanted items from piling up and frees up my energy to deal with other things. 

3. Learn and Grow

  If you are feeling stuck or unsure about how to clear the clutter or organize the messes in your life, there are two great books which helped me immensely. The first is Terri Savelle Foy’s Declutter Your Way to Success. This book changed my life dramatically and helped me learn to get my chaos under control and to see how my messes were holding me back from my dreams and goals. The second, ADD - Friendly Ways To Organize Your Life, by Judith Kolberg and Kathleen Nadeau, PH. D. Is chalk full of practical solutions for organizing your home and life. I had originally bought this to help my ten year old, but I found that it helped me far more than I ever expected. 

  In her 90 Day Devotional, Live Your Dreams, Terri Savelle Foy states, “A mess is any disagreement between the way you desire things to be and the way they actually are.” This year, it’s time to sort out the messes so you can break through to being the person you desire to be. Start making it your routine to be organized, find ways to eliminate clutter, and seek out ways to grow and become better in this area. I can’t wait to see you succeed! 

~ K. L.W.

Who Are You?

   Good Morning Friends!  Are you working on new habits for the new year?  I hope you have dreams and goals and are pursuing them, but if you're like most people, beginning a new habit can be an uphill battle, and you will probably have to work at it for some time to make it a routine.  There is a mindset though that can help you as you begin your transformation from who you are right now to the best version of you.  Creating new habits is not just about adding something new to our lives, it's about becoming someone different in the process.  Terri Savelle Foy, in her book, Live Your Dreams:  A 90 Day Dreams and Goals Devotional, poses the question, "Who do you need to become in order to have the dreams in your heart?"  

    Most of the habits and resolutions we make are not about the action itself, but about who we become by doing that action.  If you set a resolution to eat more salads this year, it's probably not just because you feel like eating salad.  It's because you want to become a healthier person.  Likewise, if your goal is to make time for a weekly date night, it's not just for the fun of date night, it's because you want to become a better spouse. 

    Sometimes amidst the struggle of trying to create new routines, we forget that it's about the process of becoming.  We want so desperately to get the end result, being ten pounds lighter or speaking that new language, that we forget the joy in the journey.  Growth takes time and effort, but keeping this mindset in perspective can help you along the way.  Jack Canfield states it beautifully in The Success Principles when he says, "What can never be taken away is who you have become in the process of achieving your goal."  

    Our habits and routines are the tools we use to reach our end goals, but ultimately, we have dreams and goals because of who we are and who we hope to become.  As you focus on your action steps this week, try to see yourself as your end goal, a healthy person, or a debt free individual, or an entrepreneur. See yourself as the person you desire to create through your new habits. The more you change your vision of yourself, the easier it will be to align your actions with that vision. Arnold Schwarzenegger said, "Create a vision of who you want to be, and then live into that picture as if it were already true." 

    This week, keep working on your new habits, routines, and goals, but allow your focus to rest on the bigger picture. Who are you becoming?  And what type of life are you creating by your habits?  Keep the ideal version of you in mind, and it will be a lot easier to live into your new habits.  I can't wait to see you succeed!

~K.L.W. 

Where We Came From

   Good Morning Friends!  Did you hit the ground running after new years?  Or did you slack off and fall into your old 2020 patterns?  Or maybe you fell somewhere in between. Sometimes we try so hard to start so many new habits at the beginning of the year that we derail and overwhelm ourselves from the start. No matter how your year kicked off, there is benefit to taking time to slow down, refocus, and look back and reflect on how far you've come. For those of us who are always trying to improve and hit goals, sometimes we can be hard on ourselves, and we forget how much we have already accomplished.  But, in the profound words of my husband, "You have your whole life to figure your life out."  Sometimes amidst our struggle and hustle to get better, we need to simply press pause and take a look back over our shoulder to see just how much ground we've already covered.  Here are a few practices which can help you as you do that. 

1.  Slow down with Meditation 

    Taking some time daily to simply sit still and breath can help us to slow the chaos of our minds and re-center ourselves. If you've never tried this before and it feels intimidating, I promise you, it's not.  You can go on YouTube and search for Meditations for Beginners, and you will pull up all sorts of short guided meditation which you can give a try to.  The point is really to slow down and focus on just breathing and being in the moment.  This practice is beneficial in many ways, but especially as you train yourself to begin being more mindful in your day to day life. 

2.  Be Still and Know

    If you're a believer, like I am, then you probably know that God says in his word, "Be still and know that I am God."  But how many of us really practice this on a regular basis?  Do we stop and simply dwell on God and allow his Spirit to speak to ours?  If we did, you can bet we would have more peace and wisdom in our lives, and we wouldn't be trying to carry the weight of the world all by ourselves. The verses below might give you a good place to start.  Spend some time dwelling on them and allowing God to speak to your heart today. (Psalm 46:10, Isaiah 26:3, James 1:5, Matthew 11:38-30)

3.  Look Back with Gratitude

    Practicing being grateful on a daily basis is a great way to bring more joy and positivity into our lives.  But looking back at where we started and seeing how far we've come is also helpful for us to keep on moving forward.  Sometimes we get so caught up in our daily struggles, that we neglect to see and be thankful for where we are.  When was the last time you sat down and thought about your circumstances five years ago verses now?  Was your job different?  Are you healthier now?  Do you have more savings and less debt?  Have you started new habits?  Take a few minutes to really reflect and be thankful for where you are.  Sometimes the journey ahead looks long, but you've already come so far.  Use that knowledge to propel you forward. 

    It might seem counterintuitive to slow down at the beginning of the year when you are just trying to ramp up your new habits.  But often times, slow and steady wins the race as the age old tale has been trying to tell us.  When you run full speed ahead into all the busyness of life day after day, you eventually burn yourself out and stop your progress.  But if you can learn to be mindful, to listen for God's quiet leading, and to look back with gratitude, you will find your journey is a lot lighter.  Take the time to slow down, be still, and be thankful today.  I can't wait to see you succeed!

~K.L.W. 

Biting off More than You Can Chew

   Hi Friends!  I hope you are forging ahead into the new year and working on the goals you have set for yourself.  If you're anything like me though, you may have made a classic mistake going into the new year.  I have been chasing down goals for a lot of years now, and I still tend for fall for this one.  It's so easy to do, because when you write your goals down, you feel hopeful and excited about all you want to accomplish, so naturally, when you lay out your action steps, you immediately try to work on them all at once.  For example, trying to work on your health goal, your relationship goal, your financial goal, your personal goal, and your career goal all at once. Just me?  No?  

    I've talked to you before about how to eat an elephant. You take one bite at a time (ie, small actionable steps towards your big goals.)  But what happens when you decide, "I can eat the elephant faster if I just take bigger bites."  Sounds logical right?  Unfortunately, this is a self destructive pattern.  Any parent will tell you that taking bigger bites doesn't generally lead to eating faster, it leads to choking.  

    Terri Savelle Foy says it this way, "If you focus on too many priorities, you will become one fragmented mess, incapable of completing your purpose and carrying out your vision."  (Live Your Dreams:  A 90 Day Dreams and Goals Devotional) I don't know about you, but that doesn't sound like how I want to live. 

    The experts (you know, the people who actually have achieved their dreams and goals and been deemed successful), say you should focus on no more than one to three goals at a time.  Yikes!  That's a hard one for me.  I'm preaching to the choir here, believe me.  I generally write out ten goals for the year, and I attempt to work on all ten at once, then get frustrated and have to scale back.  Wouldn't it be better to just focus on one at a time?  Even if you spend one month focusing and building a habit related to each of ten goals, you would still have two months left over to spare for slip ups.  (Not that you have any of those, right?)

    So here it is.  If you are feeling overwhelmed by your goals already (or if you meant to set some goals and didn't yet), take some time and decide which of your goals is the most important to you first.  After all, you only have so much time, mental energy, and will power.  Then, commit to a habit related to that goal for one month.  Once you have established that habit, move on to the next one.  

    If you're feeling stressed out, fragmented, or overwhelmed by your goals already this year, it's ok.  Take a step back. Breathe. Stop trying to do so much.  You're only human. Pick one goal and get focused on that.  You can eat that elephant, one SMALL bite at a time.  Make it your best year yet, friends!  I can't wait to see you succeed!

~K.L.W.