Hit Refresh

  Good Morning Friends!  Ever feel like you've sunken into a lull?  Like maybe you are just dragging along getting through each day instead of excelling like you were mean to do?  We all go through times that are not as exciting as others in life, and we all go through days when we feel like we're trudging through mud just trying to get by.  But you don't have to stay stuck where you're at.  You can reinvigorate yourself and get back on your way.  Here are a few simple strategies to use to get yourself back up and moving forward.
  The first thing I usually do if I am in a slump is to find a day when I don't have anything else planned.  I usually pick my first available day off, and I set that as my refresh day.  Then, I use that day to do a few specific things.  The first of these things is rest.  You may feel like I am harping on rest, because I've even written a few posts about it, but I cannot overstate the value of being well rested.  God did not intend for us to run our bodies into the ground and exhaust ourselves trying to build our empires.  Psalm 127:2 says, "In vain you rise early and stay up late, toiling for food to eat-- for He grants sleep to those He loves."  God wants us to function at our optimum health, and part of that means taking care of our physical bodies by giving them the rest and nutrition they need.
  Secondly, on my reset day, I take time to really sit down and read, pray, and write out my goals and ambitions for the year and get a plan of action together.  Sometimes we get off course and get discouraged and we lose sight of what it is we were working towards in the first place.  Use your day of relaxation to fix your eyes back on the goal so that you can start pressing forward with full steam.     The third thing I do on this day is to get organized.  I organize my space, my week, my finances, anything that I need to clear out so that I can get mentally focused and get back on track with moving forward.
  Lastly, try to get some time outside if you can.  Go for a long walk at a nearby park and just allow yourself to clear out your headspace.  Pray, meditate, just breath.  The mind body connection is amazing.
  When you get your mind and your environment free of clutter, and you take the time to refresh yourself and retrain your focus, you find yourself lifted out of your slump and ready to start the next day.  You will go to bed and wake up with excitement for where you are headed.  Don't allow yourself to stay in a slump.  Give yourself the refreshing you need, and get moving on your journey again.  I can't wait to see you succeed!

~K.W.

When the Going Gets Tough

  Ok friends, ever get into one of those phases of life where you are facing a mental or emotional crisis, and you can't seem to manage juggling all the things you usually do?  I am going to share with you tonight the way to "keep it all together" when you just can't "keep it all together."  You can keep your life relatively in order and functioning even when you are not at 100%, and I've got a few suggestions to help you with doing that.

1.  Keep track of deadlines.
     Ok, if you do not happen to be a super organized person, do yourself a humongous favor and get a planner.  You can do this digitally or on paper, but it needs to be somewhere where you will see it and see it often.  I personally use an App, (Wunderlist) and a planner, several planners in fact.  Once you have a planner, start to write down every important date you need to be aware of.  This could be things like, deadlines to submit paperwork for your job, birthday parties, doctor's appointments, work schedules, travel plans, bills that need paid, etc.  The goal here is to not get caught unaware by events because you can always see what's coming next and be prepared for it.  No more of those "Oops I forgot we have snack for soccer tonight, maybe I can sneak out during the game and get something" moments.  Then, even if a crisis hits, you become ill, or something comes up which pulls you out of your norm, you know the main things which need to be done and when.

2.  Know your priorities.
     If you're like me, there are probably a lot of things you do throughout your day which help your life run more smoothly but are not necessities.  Things like sweeping floors,  getting the mail, even mowing the yard, or hosting lunch on Sunday's for your family are all things which can be delegated or rearranged or just left undone if life hits you with one of those disrupting curve balls.  Figure out what you can and can't live without.  For me, my son's appointments can't be skipped, but getting the dog's toenails trimmed can wait another week.  I also know it's a priority for me to have my Scripture reading, praying, and writing time daily.  I just don't function without it, so if it comes down to putting on my makeup or getting a little time with God in, I pick reading the majority of the time.  Know what you have to do, and know what you can let go or pawn off for a bit.  Not every season will be as demanding as the one you might be facing, so cut yourself a break and learn to let a few things drop if you need to.

  Ultimately, we don't always get warnings about when our life is going to make a dramatic shift, but we can stay afloat if we take the time to be organized and know our priorities.  Know that if you're in  rough phase, it won't stay this way forever, and you can come through it stronger and wiser than ever.  Keep paddling towards the goal, and hang on to what's most important.  I can't wait to see you succeed!

~K.W.

Back At It

  Good Morning Friends! I hope you haven’t missed me too much in the last few days. I took a little hiatus to make a surprise trip to visit my family for the holiday, and I ran into some technical difficulties with my website while I was out of town.  All is resolved now, and you can expect your daily dose of K.W. thoughts to keep coming at you again!  I hope you are taking time to enjoy your life and your family too, and today I want to talk to you about how a little bit of encouragement can go a long way.  Your words are so powerful, and when used for good, this power can have quite an impact on the people around you.
  Have you ever had someone just speak a few simple words to you in passing that brightened your day or gave you courage to press on? This is the power of our words at work, and I want to challenge you to become better at using your words to lift others up. We all know how easy it is to tear down with our words. We hear negative talk from our co-workers, Facebook friends, probably even at our churches. But how about if we all started making a conscious effort to only speak good things about each other. In fact, this concept is so important that there are whole sections devoted to it in the timeless classic, How To Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie.  One of his guiding principles is that we must "give honest and sincere appreciation" to others.  Think of the last time your boss, spouse, or just a stranger on the street gave you a genuine complement.  Think of how this made you feel.  Did you feel like you have more energy, confidence, and joy?  Strive to make other people around you feel this way on a daily basis.  When people leave your presence, do they feel uplifted or beat down? You hold the power to change the lives of people around you by taking the time to simply encourage them.
  My grandma is an excellent person at words of encouragement.  She is always stopping her family members to hug them and tell them she is proud of them or she loves them.  She makes you feel better when you talk with her.  That is an example we can all benefit from following in this area.  Make it your aim today to see how many people you can lift up by genuine words of encouragement.  Insincere flattery will get you no where, and I do not recommend it, but learn to give authentic, loving compliments, and you will find that people around you instantly brighten up.  Make it an uplifting weekend.  I can't wait to see you succeed!

~K.W.

Get Out of Your Head

  Sometimes as human beings we start to get the feeling that we really know a lot.  We can spend a lot of time inside our own heads, thinking our own thoughts and feeling like we've got it pretty much together.  But usually what I find is that when I read a book, or attend a church service, listen to a podcast, or attend a conference, I am confronted with new ideas, and I walk away with greater knowledge, insight, and usually a few things I want to work on getting better at.  My point is that, if we only ever stay inside our own heads, we will have a tendency to think we know it all, and this is a dangerous place to be because when you think you've made it, you stop growing.
  If you have dreams and goals you want to accomplish, or even if you just want to become a better version of you, find ways to challenge yourself by connecting with people and ideas outside of yourself.  Do not allow yourself to become stagnate and stay in the same place.  You need to be confronted daily with things that will push your comfort zone and knowledge further.  You cannot do this on your own.  The only way to truly do this is by surrounding yourself with others who know more than you, and seeking out resources which will give you more insight.  As one of my mentors likes to say, "You only know what you know."
  Make it a priority this week to schedule time to learn and grow.  Listen to audios and read books daily, get involved in conferences, learning opportunities, churches, and communities which give you opportunities to expand your horizons.  Growth is vital to your success, and I cannot wait to see you reach your fullest potential.  Make it an awesome week!

~K.W.  

Be Original

  In America we have a culture which celebrates individuality but also puts a lot of pressure on us to do what everyone else is doing by making us feel like we're missing out if we don't.  But I'm here to tell you that you don't have to do what everyone else is doing.  You can be free to live as God created you to live, and that may be different than anyone else around you.  One of the most freeing things I ever read in the Bible is Galatians 5:1 which states, "It is for freedom that Christ has set you free.  Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery."  God has freed us to live completely unhindered as we are in Him, but when we allow what other people expect of us or the social norms to control us, we bind ourselves again and we lose that freedom we were given.
  So what is it that is enslaving you today?  Do you feel pressured to follow in your families history of alcoholism?  Maybe everyone expects you to go to college, but you know that's not for you.  Social expectations can be positive or negative, but if you know in your heart of hearts that you are not meant for that thing, then don't give in to the pressure to become a part of it.  Maybe you thought you needed to be a "good" parent and join the PTA, but once you did you felt burdened by the pressure to always be at events and help with projects, and instead of being a blessing, you found yourself weighted down by the responsibility you chained yourself too.   This is what the verse means by not allowing yourself to be enslaved again.  Be proud of who you are.  For myself, I know that I cannot commit to things that require my physical presence on a weekly basis, simply because with my work schedule, my travel schedule, and my child's behavioral health concerns, I know there will be many times when I will be unable to fulfill that commitment and it will become a burden.  So when I seek to minister to other people, I often do it through gifts, or spending a little one on one time and taking them out to dinner.  I find it is far easier for me to give of my income and my things than it is for me to make time commitments.  So when everyone else is getting on board with being the "homeroom mom" or soccer coach, I know that's not for me, and I don't feel bad about it.  I will volunteer to bring snacks, buy extra school supplies, or pay for another child's books at the book fair.  I know what works for me, and I find ways to live within my strengths.
  I want to encourage you to live in freedom today.  Do not feel you have to follow the crowd.  Listen to that still, small voice which is telling what to do, and you can let go of the needless burdens we all place on ourselves by trying to be something we're not.  Find what works best for you, and leave the rest behind.  I can't wait to see you succeed!

~K.W.

Attitude is Everything

  I often get asked the question, "Why are you so happy?"  And it always baffles me when people say this, because most of the time when people ask me this, they aren't asking because they want the secret to happiness, they are asking in an almost annoyed manner, as if it offends them that someone is happy and cheerful.  And I think to myself during those moments, "Doesn't everyone want to be happy?"  Yet, so many people live their lives in a complete state of misery, dragging themselves from one task to the next as though they gain satisfaction from being dejected and angry.  Personally, I don't want to be associated with that kind of attitude, and that's exactly what it is, an attitude.
  We can choose each day whether we will be positive and uplifting or whether we will be negative and deflating.  And believe it or not, your attitude is not determined by your circumstances.  You control your attitude, and you can make it as positive or negative as you choose.  There is nothing forcing you to be miserable, ornery, and discouraged.  Only you have the power to allow yourself to be that way.  And you have the power to choose happiness and positivity too.
  And if you aren't a super positive person now, it's ok.  You can change.  Start right now to pay attention to the thoughts in your head and the words that come out of your mouth, and begin replacing them with more productive thoughts.  For example, there are many days when I think to myself, "I'm tired."  But I try to not allow those words to come out of my mouth.  Instead I try to find other things to talk about or focus on.  You get what you magnify in life, so if you are always declaring, "I'm broke,"  you probably are broke and will stay broke if you don't change this negative attitude.
  Start today to begin replacing your negative attitudes and little by little you will become more positive, and as a result you will have a more positive life.  Your attitude is linked to everything from your health to your income, so make an effort to keep a good attitude.  It will be well worth your while.  Let's tackle this life together!   I can't wait to see you succeed!

~K.W.

People Matter

  Ever have one of those days where things just don't go according to plan?  Sometimes, no matter how well laid our schemes for the day are, things just don't cooperate the way we would like them to.  But ultimately, we have to realize that there is something more important than plans, and that something is people.  People and the relationships we build with them are why we are here on earth.  People are who we are sent to love, nurture, help, and care for.  Sometimes we get so caught up in all the "things" that we forget about the real one thing that matters most.
  I want to encourage you to put your relationships at the forefront of what matters.  Value people over material items or agendas, and your life will get to where it needs to go.  Now, I'm not saying you can neglect the things that need done in your life every day, but I am saying that you should take time to speak kindly to the cashier at Wal-mart, put aside your plans to take that phone call from a friend in need, spend your weekend helping your elderly neighbor with yard work.  There are so many meaningful opportunities in life to love on other people.  Do not let them pass you by.  Success is not measured by the number in your bank account, but by the invisible unseen thread that ties you to other lives.  How many people can genuinely say they have been impacted by you?  How many people have been encouraged by your words and actions?  How many lives have you changed with yours?
  At a time when the media seems to be alienating and distancing and dividing us from one another more and more, be that person who reaches out and makes a connection.  Be the hand that guides another to safety.  Be the voice that lifts up, not tears down.  We need to love each other, and we need to help each other, whether or not we have the same religion, political view, gender, race, or status.  We all need relationships.  Let's build the world through real friendships and real experiences.  Don't forget the reasons behind your desire for success...to make the world a better place, to help your family, to make life better for others.  All these things happen through relationships.  Don't let the moments pass you by.  Love those you come in contact with, whether it fits in your schedule or not.  I love you, and I can't wait to see you succeed.

~K.W.

Being the Best

  Ok, I'll admit it... my husband is better at video games than me.  And this makes me mad.  Why?  Because I like to be the best... at everything.  And there happens to be a certain level of Crash Bandicoot that my 8 year old and I have been trying to beat for about a month, and tonight my husband said, "Can I have a try?"  And after two attempts he made it to the end of the level, at which point I demanded that he quit the game, because I will absolutely, under no circumstances allow him to have the glory for something that I have worked this long and this hard to try to conquer.  (And in case your wondering, no, I still haven't beat it.)
  Ok, so all joking aside, it's one thing to be this silly over a video game, but many times we have this same mindset in our lives.  We feel frustrated and angry when someone else is good at something we struggle with, and sometimes we don't want to let them get any credit for being good at it, even if that means none of us win.  If we truly want to succeed though, we have to guard ourselves against this mindset.  We are all equipped with different strengths on purpose.  If someone else is really good at something you need, learn to become allies with that person, rather than alienating them.  You may find that if you enlist their help, they have a weakness that you can assist with too.  Successful leaders know that they must build a team of people around them who have strengths they do not have, and who can do things better than them in many areas.  You may have some level of success alone, but to truly make it to the top genuinely requires a village of people.
  So when that person at your job gets top salesman again this month, don't hate on them, instead, seek out their advice.  Most people are willing to share what they know with you.  Or if your friend made another awesome connection that opened a great door for her, instead of being angry and grumbling that things never go that well for you, ask her how she does it.  Go with her to an event and learn some of her strategies.  It's time we stopped all the jealousy and competing and truly helped one another succeed.  Be humble; seek out those who have more strengths than you, and never stop learning.  I can't wait to see you succeed!

~K.W.

Home Makeover

  If you own a home or rent an apartment, you are probably familiar with the seemingly never-ending list of projects and to-do's which need done.  I know that when I look around my home I see all the potential of what I could do.  I see walls that could be painted and flooring to replace, window sills to stain and landscaping to mulch.  I know the potential in my residence, and I'm sure you feel similarly about your home.  However, even though we know all that our homes could be, most of us don't go about completing all these projects at once.  It's usually a process, a step by step rendering of the imagine in our minds onto the physical reality of our home.  It might be a weekend project, or winter project or vacation project.  And with each new accomplishment, we celebrate how much better and brighter our home looks.  We invite friends and family and point out the new paint job or countertops.
  In the same way as we can see the potential in our homes and we go about gradually changing them from what they are to what they could be, God sees the potential in each of us, and He does not do His work overnight, but rather over a lifetime.  Project by project He changes and completes us, and He celebrates each new victory in our lives.  2 Corinthians 3:18 tells us that God continually changes us "from glory to glory.''  Each new phase is considered beautiful, and even if we can't see all that we are destined to become, He can, and He is continually bringing us closer to the very best version of ourselves.
  Don't get discouraged with where you are or how far you have to go.  Know that you are a lifetime project, and God will keep working with you and in you until the day you leave this earth.  Houses don't get renovated overnight, and neither do we.  Day by day we are becoming better versions of ourselves, and this should bring us courage and joy.  Know that your tomorrows can be better than your yesterdays if you will allow God to continue His work in you.  He sees the finished picture, and He is changing you more and more into the best version of you.  Keep your chin up and keep moving forward.  I can't wait to see you reach your potential and succeed!

~K.W.

Fighting Your Battles

  Do you ever feel like you fight the same battle over and over again?  Maybe you struggle with gossiping or anger; maybe it's a particular thought pattern or bad habit; maybe it's laziness or procrastination.  I read a thought provoking quote by Margaret Thatcher today.  It said, "You may have to fight a battle more than once to win it."  (As taken from Girls With Swords by Lisa Bevere)
How true this statement is, and yet so often we get frustrated with ourselves and beat ourselves up when we are challenged time and again.
  Facing the same struggle does not mean you are a failure.  It just means your journey isn't over yet.   Are you growing and progressing?  Maybe you chose not to gossip 8 out of 20 times this week.  You can look at it as failing 12 times or succeeding 8 times.  If you choose to focus on the battles you've won, then you can keep moving forward.  Don't keep score of your failures and shortcomings.  Just work at being better each day.  If you have a habit of complaining, try setting a timer on your phone for one hour and committing to not complaining during that time.  When the hour is up, set it again.  Does this mean you will never complain again in your life?  I doubt it.  I don't think even the most spiritual person can go his or her whole life without complaining.  That is a battle you may fight daily, or hourly, or by the second.  Just know that each battle is a chance to win a victory and move farther along on your path to spiritual and personal maturity.  The great thing about life and about our God is that "His mercies […] are new every morning."  (Lamentations 2:22-23)  God will never give up on you, and He will keep working on you everyday of your life to bring you closer to who you were made to be.  (Philippians 1:6)
  Whatever struggle you are facing right now, know that it is a new day and a new week, and there are new opportunities for you to win the battle you are fighting.  Keep pressing forward and take new ground this week.  Make it an awesome Monday!  I can't wait to see you succeed!

~K.W.                                                                                                                                                                                                                    

Give a Little Grace

  Most of us are familiar with the concept of grace.  But my question for you today is, are you giving grace?  Now believe me, I know it's easy to judge or get uptight about someone else's behavior, but if you try to live with the assumption that people have good intentions at heart, you will be filled with much more peace, and you can learn to just let things roll off your back.  Maybe that comment from your co-worker was meant to hurt your feelings, or maybe it was just a statement that you took the wrong way.  Does it really matter?  Nope.  And if you choose to just give grace and move on you will learn that you will get along with others so much better.
  But I also want to talk to you today about giving grace to yourself.  Most of us know we should give grace to others, and I think deep down many of us want to do that, but a lot of us balk at the idea of being gracious with ourselves.  We tend to be our own worst critics, because after all, who knows us better than we know ourselves, right?  But putting so much pressure on ourselves to always be perfect is very detrimental to our health and well-being.  If every time you mess up or fall short of a goal you put yourself down, you start to gain a fear of failure, and it makes moving forward that much harder.  If, on the other hand when you mess up, you pick yourself up, say, "Oops" and move on, you can continue pushing forward towards success without fear or frustration.  I'm not saying you shouldn't try to do the right thing.  I'm just saying that when you make mistakes, as all of us do, that you don't need beat yourself up over them.  Think of it this way, if a completely perfect God knows everything you have ever done wrong or ever will do wrong and still loves you, then you can absolutely love you and learn to let your failures go.  And keeping this perspective of knowing how much we have been forgiven makes it easier to forgive others when they hurt us or disappoint us as well.
  A third area I think needs mentioning because it is so prevalent in American culture is to be gracious with your body.  We are taught that we need to always push ourselves to the limit, to do more, be more and have more, but sometimes the best thing for our bodies is just to rest.  If you are battling physical illness, mental illness, life changes, or just having a difficult season of life, you may need to give yourself some grace.  It's ok to rest.  It's ok to take a month for your mental health.  It's ok to put your needs on the priority list.  Give yourself grace.  I'm not saying to let yourself get out of doing what you need to all the time, but there are times in life when you need a little extra rest or TLC., and that's perfectly ok.  Give yourself permission to take a break.
  Wherever you're at in your journey today, know that I love you and I can't wait to see you succeed.  Be gracious with yourself and others, and let's keep moving forward.

~K.W.